I love how you are able to pick yourself up again and again and again,
by doing laps in dirty swimming pools, by running around lakes inhabited by snakes for hours, by dancing while avoiding looking in the mirror.
I love how you listen to 90 consecutive clips of social situations with positive outcomes and try your best to depict them vividly, tricking your brain,
as you are trying your best to train your prefrontal cortex to
still believe in kindness and gentleness and integrity and loyalty.
I love how you take time to really feel your emotions, to process them.
I love that you are not blocking them out or drowning them in liquor and cheap thrills.
I love how you feel all of it, every single thing, and relive every single memory.
I love that you feel deeply, that you allow yourself to feel deeply.
I love how you always keep a little bit of softness, of tenderness in your heart
in the face of harshness and coldness and lacklove.
I love your soft and gentle heart
and how it never fully stops to love,
even if your brain tells your heart
that in this world, in this age, in this country there is no real love left
and that things will only become worse, worse, worse from now on and that there is no space for people like you in this world.